poet, interviewer, musician, traveler
Glass House
There’s an upside-down house
in the pond outside the cafe.
A squad of geese in tight formation
fly over (under?) it then
disappear beyond leafless trees.
The glass-smooth pond waits
for the return of its winged tenants.
Spring has called them north,
back across the imaginary border
recognized only by us,
discomfited as we are
by the idea of freedom.
/ / /
15 March 2025
Ruckersville VA
Turns Out I’m Not Famous
I’m waiting to talk to another musician,
here at the lowest level of radio.
How many times have I done this?
Two thousand? Three thousand?
I used to think I’d be on the other end,
part of some arena-filling band
that all the DJs wanted to talk to.
It hasn’t worked out that way,
and other than the blues guys
who were rediscovered
by eager white record collectors,
not that many musicians start
a successful career in their 50s.
I’m more of the eager white type
than the neglected blues legend type,
so I guess I’ll keep my day job,
waiting here for another interview
with another rock musician.
/ / /
12 March 2025
Charlottesville VA
Stephanie and I have been engaged in trying to reclaim some of our lives from the major corporate oligarchs of our age. It hasn’t been easy but it has been rewarding. I’ve made a number of changes, including:
I switched to Proton Mail, which offers end-to-end encryption with a focus on privacy. It can be free, but I got a paid version that comes with a bunch of other stuff. And because it costs money, that’s what I give Proton rather than access to my data, which is what free services like Gmail and others get in return for my use of their platforms. I’ve had my own email addresses for years, and it was easy to fold those into Proton Mail, too. And I have a bunch of them, which is part of why I paid for the upgraded Proton service.
STORAGE
I downloaded all my data from Google Photos, Drive, Keep and elsewhere (via https://takeout.google.com), and moved it all onto a hard drive. I then deleted all that data from Google. Proton offers a Drive feature of its own, again with a focus on privacy and encryption. I’m backing up my photos there, and also using it when I need to share files. And then I’ll keep local copies of those files on an external drive. As for sharing photos, I’m doing that more with messages to people, although I am making limited use of social media. (See below.)
CAMERA
I have a Google Pixel phone, which means all the standard apps on it are from Google and all are tracked and data-mined. I installed a different camera app on my phone because there was no way to stop Google from capturing those photos using its native camera app. Now I can back up those photos using Proton.
PASSWORD MANAGER
I’ve used Dashlane as a password manager for years, but since the Proton suite came with Proton Pass, I switched. It offers all the usual password manager services, plus some nice extras like the creation of email aliases, which make it easy to sign up for websites and newsletters using a fake email, and then to know which particular website or newsletter sold your data if one of those fake emails starts receiving spam. Proton Pass integrates with Firefox and works well on my phone, too.
BROWSER
This wasn’t a change for me, just something I wanted to mention. I’ve been using Firefox for years because of its privacy protections. I also use the Tor browser when privacy and anonymity are paramount. But I use Firefox in my everyday life. It’s oodles better than Edge or Chrome or Safari in terms of data protection and tracking. And I’ve added extensions that make it even more secure.
MESSAGING
I’ve been using Signal for a long time, but recently I’ve started asking everyone with whom I regularly text to switch. (Find me on Signal here.) I don’t know what’s coming next in our current dystopia, but it sure seems worth it to have security in messaging, even if what you’re sending seems innocuous. Signal is free and secure and it’s just as easy to use as whatever messaging app you’re using now. And yes, it’s more secure than WhatsApp. It’s also great if you have friends outside the US with whom you regularly chat. You can make audio and video calls via Signal, share photos and files, and create group chats. You should just assume that every message you send that isn’t on Signal is being read by someone other than the recipient, because that’s the amount of security provided by Android and iOs.
SOCIAL MEDIA
Yes, the ubiquitous and insidious and useful and awful bane of our collective existence. I’ve greatly curtailed my use of social media, and when I do post I either do it via a third-party app or via my browser, because I’ve removed the apps from my phone. I’ve installed a Firefox extension called SocialFocus to limit my time on the apps in the browser and also to limit what I’m able to see when I log in. Right now there’s no replacement for Instagram in our community as a source of activist news, and it’s also useful for the arts and for global news that media outlets don’t cover. (Al Jazeera is good for some things, and I also listen daily to Means Morning News and the headlines portion of Democracy Now.)
MAPS
I switched from Google Maps to Here We Go. That’s we used on our vacation a couple weeks back and it worked well, both when we had a data connection and when we didn’t.
NOTES
I used Google Keep for years as my note-taking app (very similar to Notes on an iPhone). When we started this process, I switched to UpNote. But then I watched a series of YouTube videos (1, 2, 3, 4) and decided to try paper note-taking again. I’ve done it many times over the years, but I always go back to the convenience of my ever-present phone. I’ve been using paper for about a week. I keep a small Field Notes notebook in my pocket for to-do items, and another for thoughts. It’s working well so far. If I have a more complex thing like a URL that I need access to in multiple places, I use UpNote.
MUSIC
I switched from Spotify to Tidal a while back because Tidal is better for artists. I also listen to a lot of music on vinyl, and buy music directly from artists on Bandcamp (the best digital platform for artists). Soon I’m going to get a portable audio player (akin to an iPod) so I can keep my music separate from my phone and also build an intentional collection on the device. Having access to everything ever recorded is amazing (and teenage me would have died of happiness), but it’s also the case that I know and connect to what I listen to now much less than I did when the records or tapes or cassettes I owned were all I had to listen to. I’ll still be using those digital services for music discovery and for things I can’t find any other way. Those numbered links in the previous item have a lot more on this.
BOOKS
I have a Kindle. Last week I canceled my Amazon account. My Kindle still works, largely because for years I’ve been getting my ebooks from other sources and putting them on my Kindle using a piece of software called Calibre. It’s also possible to transfer them directly without any software because your computer will see your Kindle as a hard drive. There are many places to get books online, both for money and for free. In this day and age, all we’re ever paying for is a license for ebooks anyway, not actual ownership. Those books (and that music) can be edited, or removed from your devices entirely, at any time without your consent or even knowledge. The other day I came across the line: “If buying isn’t owning, then piracy isn’t stealing.” Do with that what you will.
SHOPPING ONLINE VS BIG BOX STORES VS LOCAL
Part of deleting my Amazon account (in addition to ending my support of that awful company) was to bring my focus back to my community. I’m trying to shop local whenever possible, whether that means from actual people who live in my community and make things at a small scale, or whether that just means from physical stores in my community. I still buy groceries at Wegmans because my town doesn’t have a locally owned grocery store. But I also shop at the farmers markets. I buy records and books from local sellers. I eat at non-chain restaurants. And I’m going to try to stop shopping online as much as possible. It’s important to know that we live in capitalism (and most of you reading this live in the United States) so there are times when you can’t avoid the big players. And some folks live in food deserts or have no other store they can get to than a Walmart or Dollar General. So we all just have to do the best we can, and offer grace to folks who don’t have our luxuries.
CASH
I don’t think I’ve regularly used cash since I moved back from Japan in the 90s. I use a debit or credit card for everything. But moving forward, I’m going to pay in cash as much as possible. This reduces fees for merchants, removes tracking from your purchases, and also helps you stick to a budget (if you’re like me and bad with the little money you have).
CONCLUSION
I’m sure there are things I’m forgetting. If you want a good step-by-step guide to a lot of this stuff, this one is excellent. Corporations don’t care about us, except as big veins of data they can mine. Corporations rule everything around us, and that’s only getting worse and worse. Most of us can’t go off the grid, but we can limit our exposure. I hope some of this helps.
One CommentVultures
You can’t leave your house without seeing a vulture.
That’s not even a metaphor, just how it is.
And why not? Vultures eat dead things, decaying things.
Where better to fly than over the United States?
Today at a vigil for Palestine we talked about whether,
in 50 years, this era would be seen as a watershed moment
in the rush toward Gilead, or whether the slow enshittification
of everything would continue, with the goalposts of the illusion
of security moved a little more each year, but never enough
for Americans as a whole to actually, you know, do anything.
There are still shows on TV, there’s still food at the supermarket.
That seems to be all most people need to pretend it’s all OK.
In some cultures vultures represent rebirth.
I know if I looked out my window right now, I’d see one.
Eventually even the black holes will fade.
The universe will die in ice.
What unimagined harbinger
might watch from outside the darkness?
/ / /
3 March 2025
Charlottesville VA
scenes from a Sunday stroll
an old man hunches over
the engine of his minivan
a young woman with two kids
walks slowly toward the park
a bluebird bursts from a bare tree
strafes the grass, disappears
sunspots on the rocks
at the bottom of a slow creek
the sound of the vulture’s wings
reaches us before the sight
it smells slightly of old pine
at the end of the wooded trail
a slim volume in Polish next to
airport reads in the free library
someone changes a bicycle tire
on the front stoop of their house
a hooded figure in a parka
trudges up a slight incline
a person loads their van
with clear plastic boxes of clothing
Herman Melville’s head
peeks above our mailbox
a greeting from our cat
as we come in the front door
/ / /
2 March 2025
Charlottesville VA
the eighties
we listened to Pink Floyd & Rush
Genesis & Yes & King Crimson
Marillion & a-ha & Depeche Mode
we watched Monty Python
& Robin Williams & Red Dwarf
& Big Trouble In Little China
we ordered pizza
bought snacks at Wegmans
stopped at Perkins in the wee hours
we read Watchmen & The Dark Knight Returns
The Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy
The Chronicles Of Amber & Tolkien
we played in the marching band
we played in the wind ensemble
we (some of us) played in a rock band
we planned to go to college
we planned to never get married
we couldn’t imagine having kids
we’re not all around anymore
most of us are parents now
most of the rest of it is the same
/ / /
28 February 2025
Charlottesville VA
ambient guitar music for feline escape artists
this morning the cat got out
this afternoon I found him
a guitar winds its way
through the bedroom
the cat sleeps through it
/ / /
27 February 2025
Charlottesville VA
last words before sleep
a fake ocean for company
windows open, warm night
/ / /
26 February 2025
Leave a CommentCircle Pit
We’re packed into L’Anti Bar
while Crachat slams into their last song.
They’re wild, ferocious, loud, glorious.
A room full of hometown fans
jump and smash and sing along.
Then it’s over. During the break
two locals talk to me in English.
They want to know why I’m here
in Québec for a punk show.
They recommend bands and a cool bar
for the after-party, not knowing
I’ll be in bed as soon as the next band is done.
Stephanie and I get closer to the stage.
It’s time for Taxi Girls, the reason we added
hours of extra driving to an already long trip.
They rip into the first song,
leave claw marks on the crowd.
Stephanie weaves even closer,
phone camera as talisman.
I hold our coats, sleeves stuffed with
festival t-shirts, keffiyehs, our hats.
The band starts “The Lion’s Share.”
We belt out the words. I play air guitar
under the coats. Nerd to the core.
After the show we chat with the band,
buy records, get them signed,
walk to our rented apartment
through the frigid night,
slowing down to photograph
queer anarchist graffiti
because we’re queer anarchists.
La musique punk est
le langage universel
de la révolution.
21 February 2025
Québec
Exploration
The music of an oud
dances across the room
as we lie in bed together
at the end of a full day.
We started with tea
in a cafe near the hotel,
then visited an artist friend,
a record store,
and a trans bookstore.
A typical day for us,
no matter where we are.
We followed the St. Lawrence
from Montreal to Québec,
then ate ramen
in a restaurant where the staff
spoke Fraponaise.
Tomorrow it’ll be more records
and books and anarchist shops,
then a punk show at night,
later than we’re usually awake.
The joy of exploring new places
is magnified by doing it with you.
Two brains and two hearts
combining to see and feel more
than either could alone.
/ / /
20 February 2025
Québec
The Blizzard Of ’25
George, our server, said
the city hasn’t seen this much snow
since the 1800s.
We’d taken a winding track
through narrow neighborhood streets
made even more impassable
by six-foot drifts on each side.
Buried sidewalks meant the shreds of street
were filled with people,
stumbling and slipping on the way home.
From inside the Syrian restaurant
it all seemed like a distant memory
as we sipped cilantro mocktails
and sliced into fried cheese dumplings
with a tomato and quince jam.
The trouble with travel, I always find,
is the having to go back, just when
you were imagining you wouldn’t.
/ / /
18 February 2025
Montreal
Elephant
We eat vegetable tikka and baija,
talking about TV shows,
prog rock performances,
role-playing games.
We see the elephant in the room.
Eventually we walk over to look at it.
It sits there, quietly taking up space,
breathing in more oxygen than we do,
subtly coloring the air with its smell.
The elephant comes for all of us in time.
When we see it approach,
the most we can do is to find those we love,
pull them close, share a laugh in a cold wind.
/ / /
17 February 2025
Charlottesville VA
Between
Sitting in a coffee shop
that used to be a Chevy dealership
it occurs to me that it’s been 17 years
since I lived in this city.
Where the hell have I been?
The Bop Shop is gone from the Village Gate.
Most of the stores and restaurants I knew?
They’re gone, too.
There’s a pride flag on our old house,
so that’s nice.
I doubt my sons would even recognize it.
This is their hometown in the way Lenox is mine.
It’s where they were born, but not
where they grew up.
Today I bought some clothes
with the name of my high school.
The team name has changed.
I have changed.
I’m trying to reconnect with this part of my past.
So many terrible things happened here.
But it’s where I’m from.
I want to be from somewhere.
I want there to be places where my feet
are on familiar ground.
I’ve tried to manufacture one for decades
based on five golden years.
I’ve tried to suppress another based on
seven years of abuse and depression.
My sister has a hometown.
My kids have one, too.
I’m floating out in the space between,
looking for a place to land.
/ / /
16 February 2025
Rochester, NY
Let Me Come In And Talk To You About Dire Straits
Dan Bern said he was the Messiah.
Dire Straits said if two men say
they’re Jesus, one of them must be wrong.
As far as I know, I’m not who you’re waiting for.
But come in anyway and have a cup of tea.
Life is both long and short,
and just when you’re tired as fuck of the whole thing,
you get a glimpse of the alternative
and cling to the now like a barnacle
on the hull of a ship.
I used to sail when I was a kid.
Now watching a movie set on a boat
makes me seasick. We change, at least a little.
If I ever get to London,
I’ll climb on a box at Speakers’ Corner
and proclaim myself the Lord
just to see what happens next.
Eventually somebody might be right.
Ah, there’s the kettle.
/ / /
13 February 2025
Charlottesville VA
Confronting A Difficult Truth In Middle-Age
I’m the kind of person
who wears turtlenecks
unironically.
/ / /
12 February 2025
Charlottesville VA